The other day I was telling someone about how I’ve become friends with an ex and that it’s the most relaxed and easy friendship I have right now.  He pointed out that it’s probably because he’s not trying to jump my bones.  And I think he’s right.

This has led me to analyze every opposite sex relationship in my life over the past few days.  The conclusion that I’ve come to is that girls can be friends with guys, but guys cannot be friends with girls unless they have already slept with them and it didn’t work out.  There are always exceptions, but I’d say about 90% of the time this is true.  My reasoning for this is that every guy that I consider a relatively good friend has come on to me at some point.  Sometimes it’s subtle, sometimes it’s blatant, sometimes it catches me totally off guard.  And that’s when it goes from simple to awkward.

I don’t know how to politely say, “I just want to be friends,” when I know what will come out is, “What the shit are you doing?!”  So what do I do instead?  Avoid them like the plague.  I get busy and don’t have time to see them for awhile.  Does this solve the problem?  Doubtful.  But then when I DO see them again, I make sure it’s not too late in the evening and not too many drinks will be had.  And public places are always good, though sometimes don’t make a difference depending on the guy.

What I don’t understand is where these guys are coming from.  Are they just looking to get laid?  Is it like, “Hey, you’re my friend.  Let’s see if we can’t get a little more out of this!”  In that case, I can see their point.  It’s not a new philosophy that a guy thinks with his penis (can’t wait for the spam comments for Viagra to come flowing through now that I’ve written ‘penis’ …twice).  However, I don’t think that’s really it judging from the text messages/phone calls/emails/facebook messages that come flowing through.

This leads me to think either one of two things.  The first is that they think I’m coming onto them.  Ok.  I’ve been told that I am flirtatious in nature.  I even got ‘Coquetita’ as an award on a trip to Costa Rica my senior year of high school (translates as ‘Little Flirt’).  But I really just like to hear what people have to say; where they’ve been, where they’re going, what they’re thinking.  I don’t have any ulterior motives; I like to get to know people.  If I can’t stand you, it’s hard for me to fake it.

Number 2, however, boggles my mind and disturbs me a bit more: a false sense of chemistry.  When I meet a guy, I know within the first ten minutes if I would date him.  And this isn’t some superficial thing where I judge whether or not he’s good enough for me.  Let’s be honest here; no one is good enough for me.  Kidding!  Just joshing, my friends.  It’s just that I can instinctively tell when there is something that I’m intrinsically drawn to within a person.  Sometimes it works out, sometimes it does not.  But forcing a chemistry that’s not there is something I want no part of.  We can save that rant for another time.

What my point is in all of this, is that I’ve always valued having platonic friendships with guys.  The kind of insight you get from a guy, whether they know it or not, is astounding.  They just think so differently that it makes sense why it’s always a love/hate relationship with the opposite sex.  Girlfriends always have good advice, or at least someone who can relate to whatever you’re bitching about, but a guy’s point of view is invaluable.  Like it’s coming from another species that lives in a completely different reality.  It’s something to learn from.  And that is why I would like to keep the majority of of these guys in my good graces.  As friends.  Not more.

This girl is my cousin, former roommate, and best friend.  She is pretty much the most fun person I know and always makes me feel better if I’m having a bad day.  Or week.  Or month.  I’ve had a pretty rough few days involving, but not limited to, a bike crash and that gut-wrenching overall feeling of, “What the hell am I doing?”  Since she was supposed to come for a visit this weekend but is not, I’m channeling her smile to cheer me up.

Do you really think the Empire State Building will last 2,000 years?  I certainly don’t.  It’s too tall and skinny and made of things like glass which can break and metal which can melt.  I sure hope I get proven wrong.

Anyway, just pretend you see the lions and gladiators and women who look like goddesses.  At least that’s what I do.  It helps alleviate the frustration created by the massive amount of tourists snapping photos of the ruins.

Going through the archives of my escapades through Europe, I realized that although I have an insatiable appetite for travel, I’ve already seen some really cool things (like this sweet astronomical clock in Prague) and been to some beautiful places (like here and here).  All have been invaluable experiences.  There’s a lot of world to see out there and I’ve barely seen a square foot of it, but I’m still young and time is on my side.  That’s the thing about travel: the places you want to experience firsthand aren’t going anywhere anytime soon.

Looking back on the springtime blooms, full of hope and promises of warmth, it’s difficult to grasp that in a few months time everything will be cold and dead again.  Time to move to the tropics where a cabana boy with cold beverages is the year round norm.

Their lives in Italy were rapidly coming to an end.  They were a bit cynical about the country as a whole, but the astounding beauty that surrounded them made them shut up and take a moment to breathe in the air of the wine country.

The water was warm from a long day in the sun.  They were tired and hungry, but enveloped in unexpected awe and a happiness that would linger for a long time.  It was a day to look back on and smile.

They were friends since Kindergarten, and though they don’t see each other all that often anymore, they still understand one another in a way that is only possible when you’ve known someone since you were barely out of diapers.  While the other kids were learning how to share their toys and say “I’m sorry,” the girls were busy playing dress-up and talking about boys.  The two still aren’t all that great at sharing and are stubborn to apologize, but their sense of style and dating skills are off the charts.

Not that I ever throw out my old boots.  When they’re falling apart I bring them to my shoe guy who breathes new life into them.  My boots are similar to cats in that they have many lives.  Zoomed out version of The Nazi Tulip.

She has always been drawn to the combination of pink and green.  Her bedroom decor, her website design.  Now I think I know why: she really just likes flowers.  As any girl should.